


For an End

by twilighteve



Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: Alternate Timeline, Doomed Timelines, Gen, Magical Girls, One Shot, Short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-19
Updated: 2016-01-19
Packaged: 2018-05-14 23:35:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5763241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twilighteve/pseuds/twilighteve
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Homura hopes that somehow, her tale would have a happy ending, though at this point any kind of ending seem to be unlikely.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For an End

She sat – slumped, really – at the slab of rock, staring at the horizon with vacant eyes. The sky was murky and cold, as though detached from the Earth. The clouds were breaking, the storm that Walpurgisnacht brought dispersing, but it carried a sense of gloom, as though mourning the loss of the lives the witch had claimed and accepting the fate of being destroyed by yet another witch in the near future.

The cloud above her head parted and allowed sunshine to warm her. It didn’t feel like a blessing.

She looked around and cursed inwardly. All of this seemed so oddly reminiscent of that one timeline where Kyubey announced that Madoka was to destroy the whole planet. It shouldn’t be surprising, considering that the timelines mainly consisted of the same things with little twists every here and there. It was to be expected, really, to have one or two timelines being eerily similar to one another. But this simply meant that she had failed again, and it _hurt_.

How many times had she gone through the same variables again and again? How many times had she relived the past six week? She had lost count once she hit the twenties, since it seemed so pointless to keep track. Now she wished she had kept track. She would like to know in which timeline she would finally lose it, because at this rate a happy ending seemed unlikely.

Kyubey landed next to her and she glared at him. Anger and hatred bubbled within her, but she forced it down. They weren’t despair in any way, but they were negative emotions, and they would end up tainting her Soul Gem further if she let them. She waited for the creepy critter to talk.

He didn’t disappoint. “Incredible, isn’t it? Her power as a witch.”

She waited still.

“At this rate, not only would she destroy the planet, she might even destroy this solar system. It’s fine, though, Earth is basically the only planet capable of giving us the energy we need to stop entropy, and you girls have long since filled the quota.” He turned his ever-smiling face at her. “But if you weren’t fighting Walpurgisnacht so desperately and Kaname Madoka hadn’t seen it, she would never have contracted. So thank you, Akemi Homura.”

The hatred in Homura’s heart intensified tenfold and she gnashed her teeth. “I still don’t get it,” she growled. “Why? You’re trying to _save the universe_ ,” she ground out the phrase with barely concealed bitterness, “but why are you doing this by this method? You’re condemning us girls into death, sorrow,” she laughed, feeling the irony as she spoke the last word, “ _despair_.”

Kyubey cocked his head aside. “Why, Akemi Homura. I don’t think I’ve ever told you why we’re doing this. But to answer your answer, it is simply the simplest and quickest way to do it. When someone, especially a young girl, feels pure hope and pure despair for the first time, a large amount of energy is released, and we Incubators collect that energy. That would prevent entropy. Or, at least, stall it.”

Homura shook her head. “You have no heart,” she spat, only for the sake of getting some kind of release. Incubators didn’t know feelings and regarded them as mental issues within their ranks –she had known that for long.

“We know no such thing, Akemi Homura,” Kyubey explained simply, unaware that Homura had learned of the fact though numerous times of rewinding time.

Homura shook her head and looked ahead. In the horizon, a spinning stormcloud wandered away. Madoka’s witch was enormous, and aimed to claim life from the largest city possible, since Mitakihara was long destroyed in Homura’s taxing battle with Walpurgisnacht.

“Are you going to fight her, Akemi Homura?” Kyubey asked the time traveler, anticipation coloring his tone despite his claim of not knowing what emotion was.

Homura glanced at the creature in anger. Clearly, he still hoped that Homura could become a witch so that he could get a surplus of energy despite the fact that he had stated that Earth had filled its energy quota. “What’s the use?” she asked back instead. “It took me all of my magic and three empty Grief Seeds to fight Walpurgisnacht, and Madoka still took the killing shot in the end. Madoka’s witch is far stronger. I’m already depleted of my Grief Seeds. There is no way I can fight Madoka on my own.” Not with her dangerously murky Soul Gem. She reached into her shield and took the Grief Seed Walpurgisnacht had dropped and used it to clear her Soul Gem. The Grief Seed would be enough for ten times more uses, at least. But she decided not to bother. Grief Seeds didn’t travel in time. No matter how many times she tried they always disappeared once she returned to that hospital. It was no use trying to bring it back.

There was still time until her turnback point. She wondered why she couldn’t control the sand in her shield more freely, sometimes. But it didn’t matter, not really.

With some free time in her hand, her thoughts wandered. She wondered again, just how many times had she turn back the time. It had to be over forty times, by now. Had it reached fifty? Sixty? Maybe fifty. She wasn’t sure if she had gone to the sixties. Granted, it was only a rough estimation, but an estimation nonetheless. She would take whatever she could get.

A sigh escaped her lips, and how Kyubey blinked as he stared at her intently, studying her, didn’t escape her, though she decided she didn’t care. Fifty times, at least, she had turned back time again and again. How many times more would she have to do it? Laughter bubbled up her throat and before she could stop herself she was laughing hysterically, unable to stop herself. Kyubey studied her as though she was an interesting test subject – she probably really was in his eyes – and inched closer.

Fifty times. And who knew how many times more. The laughter grew louder, and she gasped for air in between her chortles. Just what kind of fate had she condemned herself into?

Not that she regretted it. If it meant saving Madoka, even if she had to redo the last six weeks for a million times, she would. But sometimes she wondered if there was even an end to the story she was weaving. Maybe not. Maybe she had trapped herself into a loop where she had no way out. Her laughter grew louder at the realization that she might never be able to stop redoing the six weeks in her life, harsh and bitter, even though she knew she wouldn’t even blink before making the same decision to redo those weeks over and over again if it meant saving Madoka.

She could literally feel her Soul Gem darkening. Her laugh stopped, though there was traces of giggles left. She used Walpurgisnacht’s Grief Seed once more to clean it. She would prefer to go back to the past with sparkling clean Soul Gem, since it would definitely help her magic.

“That Grief Seed would last you fifteen battles against low ranked witches, Akemi Homura,” Kyubey told her. “It would surely be enough to battle Kaname Madoka’s witch. Are you sure you’re not fighting?”

“I am,” Homura said simply. It wasn’t like she’d have the time to do it. Idly, she played with the Grief Seed in her hand, then she clenched it. She looked up at the sky. More to herself, she muttered, “If there is a god out there, I’d pray… I’d pray, with all my might, to be able to save Madoka no matter how. I’d pray for a happy ending, if possible.”

Kyubey ignored Homura’s prayer and instead mused, “You are an oddity, Akemi Homura. Most magical girls would try to save the world regardless. You simply turn your face away from the eventual destruction.”

“Just because it’s destroyed now doesn’t mean it can’t be saved earlier,” Homura retorted thoughtlessly. There was no use being careful with her words any longer. She was going to be transported back to the past anyway.

Kyubey cocked his head aside, genuine confusion and curiosity permeating off of him though his facial expression didn’t change. “What do you mean by that?”

“It means that I’m going back.” Homura’s eyes were at her shield. Her turnback point was close, so close.

Homura could practically hear Kyubey’s mind whirring to life, connecting the dots and drawing conclusions, before he gasped. “You mean – Akemi Homura, your power is to – “

She never did hear him finish that sentence. At that moment she could feel the gears controlling the time-manipulation aspect of her power in her shield clicking and whirring. Darkness enveloped her, and she closed her eyes. As always, she could almost feel the flow of time being pulled back as she waded against the stream to her intended starting point – though not so much on her own free will than being dragged, since her control over it was minimal, if not nonexistent.

The darkness spat her out. Her eyes snapped open and her vision – once dulled and blurred until she decided to heal herself – came into focus. She immediately sat, throwing the blanket over and stepped out of her bed. She couldn’t allow herself the luxury of lazing around in her bed. There was a person she had to save.

“I’ll save you this time,” she gritted her teeth, vowing quietly to herself.

It wasn’t until numerous more rewinds later that she could finally reach an end to her tale.

**Author's Note:**

> First PMMM fic. I thought to expand Homura's thoughts in a way, because it's amazing how she could keep fighting though she's repeated the six weeks over and over again. I can't imagine her going through it without ever thinking about the possibility of never being able to stop rewinding time, because if I understand correctly she'd still be transported back in time no matter the circumstances if she fails to save Madoka. Hence, an absence of any kind of ending. I don't think she wouldn't have at least one such thought.
> 
> Kyubey's characterization was a bit tricky to nail. He's basically a being with hive mind and no emotion, which makes it hard to get into his head and imagine what sort of action he'd take in a given situation. I think I did okay though?
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave a comment and tell me what you think. Hope you have a great day!


End file.
